Communication & Rapport

How to Cure an Emotional Hangover

Written by: Scott Dinsmore Have you ever felt on top of the world one minute and moments later felt like you'd fallen off an emotional cliff? Why is it that some of our favorite and most exciting experiences with others can often lead to us feeling drained or craving attention? Often the answer is that you're hung over...emotionally that is. Let me explain.

Symptoms of an Emotional Hangover

You've just had an amazing set of experiences and you suddenly:

  • Feel empty and alone
  • Are craving attention
  • Feel anxious, hurried and stressed
  • Lose your motivation to be healthy (mentally and physically)
  • Experience a feeing of excitement quickly replaced by feeling lost

Overcoming Phone Phobia: Making More Contact Written by: Scott Dinsmore

Average Reading Time: 3.5 minutes

Have you ever been scared to approach someone? Maybe a prospect or even an interesting looking man or woman? We all have. Even if it's only an email we need to write, let alone a phone call or an in-person approach, we often put off contacting new and important people until the last minute possible, if ever. I call this Phone Phobia: The fear of making contact. But it doesn't stop at the phone. Phone Phobia covers any type of contact whether it's phone, email, snail mail or face to face. Why does this happen? We know deep down what needs to be done yet we often don't do it. We are intimidated, scared, insecure or simply lacking confidence. All for what? To avoid the ever-powerful...Rejection. That one word causes more stress and anxiety than most any other. As humans we crave acceptance and any thoughts or actions that could lead to the opposite are avoided like the plague. But what's the worst that can happen? Maybe you'll gain a little experience in handling an objection. Who couldn't use a little practice there? And that's if they turn you down. If you get a yes, then suddenly the world's at your fingertips. But how do we gain the confidence necessary to approach the people and prospects who are so potentially important to our futures? I have found an answer in two words: Making Contact. Here's the rule of thumb: The longer you wait between contact with a person, the more intimidating it is to make future contact.

Average Reading Time: 9 minutes

Have you ever come across someone who knew exactly what they want out of life? Anything they say, they mean, and will quickly act on. They seem confident, eager, excited and downright passionate. You can just feel the energy. What impression did that put upon you? Chances are you were experiencing the power of congruency. Tony Robbins first brought this term to my attention in his Unleash the Power Within 4-day seminar as well as most of his CD's, talks and books. Tony is about as congruent as they come. But what does that mean? This was not the same math term I learned in high school and to be honest, it's a way of life that is difficult to define. The best way is to experience it. But let me give it a try. The general definition of congruence is: identical in form; in agreement or harmony. Now apply this to a life approach. Someone who lives with congruency acts in direct accordance with their dreams, desires, beliefs, values, mission and goals. They do not let the thoughts of others affect their approach to the world. They take their own unique path paved by their understanding of themselves.

Written by: Scott Dinsmore

Average Reading Time: 7.5 minutes

What do you think a pickup artist could teach a salesman? I bet you'd be surprised. I know I was. Can you think of a more crucial and technical sale than convincing a man or woman to go out with you, spend their time and maybe even locking lips? That sale can take a lifetime to master. A couple years ago when starting my investment business, a respected mentor and salesman recommended only one book: The Game: Penetrating the Secret Society of Pickup Artists. I laughed until I realized he was serious. Then I bought the book. He promised the techniques for picking up women were just as relevant for business relationships (well most of them at least...). A little common sense and discretion is required. It turns out that these days the author, Neil Strauss, does one-day workshops on social dynamics and rapport building for the likes of premier global management consulting companies and he charges top dollar. These guys are the cream of the crop when it comes to consulting and we can be pretty sure he isn't teaching them how to get a date. Understanding how to interact in social situations is crucial and this was a pretty entertaining (and very real) way to learn a few things.