28 Mar What I Really Care About + What you Already Have to Pursue Your Passions
Do you know what I care about?
I care about setting people up for success. Which is why it makes me upset when I log onto Facebook and Instagram and see ads promising 6 figures in 6 days.
I care about people having a realistic picture of what to expect if they are going to try to pursue something with more meaning and purpose. And a lot of what is out there these days only sets people up for failure. They are promised a quick fail-proof model, so they invest, they try, but it doesn’t work so they give up, and lose hope but gain cynicism. To me this is a disservice to the amazing opportunities that are actually out there!
I value integrity and service. And I care about helping people grow so they can give and learn so they can lead. And I see so many people stop themselves before they start because they look for the quick fix, it doesn’t work, so then they lose faith.
But as we know in many other aspects of our lives, the things in life with depth, meaning and richness often take time, patience and nurturing. You don’t just produce a child, and expect them to flourish— you nurture them, shape them, continue to show up, and help them grow… even when they aren’t reciprocating or when things get hard. And that’s what any meaningful passion project (aka your business baby) takes as well.
Some of you may have attended the Virtual Summit I participated in last week. I did that while on a ski trip with a group of 20+ friends, while all my friends were out in the hot tub drinking beers. Nothing and no one made me have to be there… I wanted to be there. Because this stuff really matters to me.
I knew in that summit it was not the group that would be preaching overnight success. Rather, despiste all of them having built business that allow them to do something they love (with the freedom to work from anywhere, like on a ski trip in France), not a single one of them was going to say it fell into their lap or came without a lot of unexpected hurdles to overcome.
I don’t say this to further discourage you, and I know it is easy to get overwhelmed by all the stuff we don’t have, and can’t do. By the uncertainty of the the how and what. Analysis paralysis is super real, and so is the imposter syndrome.
So today, while I cannot promise you a one-size-fits-all quick fix solution, I do want to highlight want you can do and already do have available to you, right now, to further the pursuit of your passions… whether that means to do something that excites you, start up a passion project or find more meaning in your day to day activities.
The one thing I can promise is that if you keep fueling these three things, forward movement will be made!
Some people are looking for a burning passion, or to discover their life’s purpose… but we have to be careful what we are looking for because those things are a HUGE ask! Some of us will, at some point feel like we have a singular purpose or mission, but others of us may never find that.
But what all already do have is curiosity… You may need to rediscover it through self-discovery or tools, or relearn to express it, but it was and is a natural part of you. And a curiosity if ignored will never expand, but a curiosity when explored, deepens into a hobby, which deepens into a passion.
But it all begins with a simple curiosity…
We all already have willingness within us, right? We choose what we are willing to do and what we are not, ie. I am willing to skip the gym for the social gathering or I am not willing to skip the gym for the social gathering. Our willingness to or not to do something dictates the actions we take on a daily basis… And guess what, you get to decide what you are willing to do.
So… are you willing to take a new look at discomfort? Because if you are, then you have identified something else you already have to get you moving forward.
I always say there are two types of discomfort: the discomfort of stagnation and the discomfort of growth.
The discomfort of stagnation may look like: boredom, insignificance, negative stories spirals, and rationalizations:
- Well I can’t do that..
- This is never going to work
- Who am I to think this is possible
- Maybe I should have, could have, would have.
- If I only I had X, Y, Z…
The discomfort of growth means to:
- Sign up for uncertainty
- To put yourself in a place of the unknown, of failure, of feeling like shit, and potentially having ZERO guaranteed outcome
- Have unfamiliar thoughts and unfamiliar emotions.
This is super scary and that’s why these types of creative ventures are often so difficult, because they all begin with first having to feel the discomfort of not even knowing what to do, and you don’t know how to do it. The automatic response is to do something else because that’s a double dose of discomfort.
However, one of these discomforts propels you forward, and therefore is temporary, whereas the other holds you back, and therefore is permanent.
So, when we begin to realize that discomfort is going to be present on the journey, we see that we are simply trading one type of discomfort for another. This permits a little self-compassion which allows everything to be a lot more doable.
So, which type of discomfort are you willing to tolerate?
Your ego, by nature, wants to believe you can do it all our own, because to learn from others, almost willingly accepts newness, and growth – and that’s pretty scary to the mind that likes comfort and sameness. So, it can feel challenging to open up your mind and your possibilities, versus stay looking through a narrow lens…
But we have all already done this.
We have done this with new love, new jobs, new experiences, new places, new foods, new thoughts! And odds are, any past experience in which you have done this, whether chosen or forced, you have found a way to adapt… because that’s how we are built.
But in order to adapt and be (or see!) something different than we currently are, we have to be willing to open up.
It’s a humbling experience to admit that you need and want help, but you will always be better for it because it makes you show up in a way that you believe you can be more as a result of the people around you. This is why accountability works, why having a community works and why I spend so much time with my mastermind members. Because I like to leverage our human nature versus work against it, and we are wired to do something for a reason greater than ourselves.
Will power works against all of your nature. But doing something because you have made a commitment to others will generally tap into that deeper more meaningful part of you (a desire to grow, connect, contribute) and get you to more than you ever would for yourself.
By getting a bigger perspective and committing to others, you will move the needle to believe and behave in alignment with what you really, deeply want far quicker than you ever would alone.
So I know I definitely didn’t answer all of life’s problems in a single blog post. Rather, I am more sharing what is on my mind because I really care about helping people realize that the quick fix isn’t the answer.
And if you do want to find deeper meaning and purpose in your life, you already have a lot of things within you that will help you do that, you just need to tap into them… and get a little help along the way. 🙂
So here’s to your curiosity, willingness and openness on the road ahead,
– Chelsea Dinsmore
P.S. I am offering an early-bird promotion of $100 off + a 1:1 session (a $350 value) for anyone who joins the Mastermind before midnight, March 31, 2019! If you know a mastermind is something you need and want, there are 3 days left to take advantage of this early bird offer. 🙂